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[personal profile] aria_lerendeair
 Title: Manners Maketh Man

Author: Aria_Lerendeair

Artist: Bright-Pyrite

Beta: Kate, you wonderful, fucking amazing darling you.  <3  

Pairing (if any): Gabriel/Sam (Sabriel)

Genre/Tropes: Spy AU

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 38,382

Warnings/Spoilers: Spoilers for the Kingsman Movie, I draw very heavily from it in places, and though I don't own the Kingsman story, I do own some of the additional plot points I added that I wish I could have seen in the movie.  

Summary: Gabriel Novak had known, since he was twelve years old that he would never amount to anything worthwhile.  He'd be a drain on society until his dying day, just like his Dad.  However, when Sam Winchester, a Kingsman agent, waltzes into his life with his bespoke suits, spy gadgets and devastating smile, to give him the opportunity of a lifetime, Gabriel can't say no.  Oh, and they have to save the world.



It was hot. 


Gabriel blinked open his eyes and spit the dirt out that he could taste on his lips.  He looked up at the glaring sun and then down at the dirt road below him.  Sound slowly started to filter into his head and he sat up. 


Fucking Sam had gassed him with something! 


"Ah, good, you're awake." 


Gabriel snapped to immediate attention at the voice in his ear.  He wasn't in London.  Somewhere in South America by the sounds of the Spanish around him.  He was also only in his boxers and people were staring.  "Where the hell am I?" 


"Merlin needed convincing before he would agree to bring you back.  We've skipped ahead a few months," Sam explained.  "You're in Columbia." 


"What's the test?" Gabriel asked, looking around.  Too much attention.  He needed to get off the street and to somewhere that he could grab clothes. 


"This is a resource test," Sam said.  "On your wrist is the location of your passport and a first class ticket to London.  The flight leaves at Midnight.  You must touch English soil within twenty four hours to pass the test.  Fail and you are out.  Understand, Gabriel?" 


Gabriel cursed and stood up, brushing himself off. 


"Also, I would advise getting off the street as quickly as possible.  The local police can be brutal and they aren't likely to take well to a Brit wandering around almost naked in the middle of the day." 


"And whose fault is that?" Gabriel snarled, his eyes widening when a police car came careening around the corner.  Oh shit!  He should have paid more attention to the fucking module about communicating in a country where you couldn't speak the language. 


He held up his hand and watched as the cop advanced, smiling hesitantly.  People all around him were averting their eyes and disappearing.  The street was almost entirely deserted now, so no one wanted to witness him being dragged off.  Okay.  Fuck


The cop had a gun on him and Gabriel looked around for a weapon of any sort.  "Uh, I'm sorry, I'm still learning the local language and I'm not entirely sure-"  He grunted when the business end of the gun was pressed into his chest.  He glanced down.  The safety was still on. 


....fuck it.


Gabriel twisted out of the way of the gun and decked the cop, dropping him with one swift hit. 


"Gabriel, what the hell are you doing?" Sam asked. 


"Fucking improvising!  I'll take his clothes, and he can sit in the back of the car naked and no one'll look twice!" Gabriel said, glancing around to make sure the street was deserted.  He stripped the cop and yanked the clothes on before cuffing the man and throwing him in the back of the car.  Two minutes later, he was sitting in the car, typing the address on his bracelet into the GPS. 


"Okay, so what the hell is this place that I'm heading to?" Gabriel asked, glancing behind him to make sure that the cop was still out.  Good.  He kept the brim of his hat low over his face so he didn't attract any attention. 


Sam hummed.  "Prominent local businessman." 


Gabriel snorted.  Sam was utter shit at lying sometimes.  How in the hell he had ended up as a super spy was beyond him.  "Right, gotcha." 


"What's your plan, Gabriel?" 


Gabriel thought about it as he followed the directions.  Twenty minutes out.  Perfect.  Maybe he'd be able to find someone to lift some money from so he could grab a different set of clothes that wasn't as conspicuous. 


"Show up, say I need to search the premises, find the ticket and passport and get the hell out of there.  I'm a cop, no reason that they shouldn't listen," Gabriel reasoned, heading towards what was clearly the richer side of town.  He raised an eyebrow when he pulled up to the place and parked the car. 


He straightened his shirt a little bit and made sure none of the dust from before was on his face.  His hair was a bit of a lost cause, but he pushed it back off his face and took a second to climb out of the car.  Time to turn on the charm.  Gabriel grinned and headed towards the front door, only to be stopped by a sudden hail of bullets coming towards him. 


He swore and dove for the car, slamming the door shut behind him as he scrambled behind the wheel.  "What the hell is going on?  Whose house is this?" 


"You fucking asshole!  That's Carmilo Marquez’s house!"


Gabriel spun around and looked at the cop behind him.  "You speak english?!"


"You didn't ask!" The cop shouted back.


Gabriel cursed as he gunned the car out of range of the bullets suddenly raining down on them.  "Who the hell is that?  Prominent businessman?  What the fuck Sam!" 


"Apologies, I should have mentioned he is also the head of the largest drug trafficking ring in Columbia.  You're low on time Gabriel, you need to find a way to get that ticket and get out," Sam said. 


Gabriel looked around the car and then back at the cop, an idea dawning.  "Do you have any machine guns?" 


The cop blinked at him.  "We're in Columbia, of course I have machine guns!  Lots!" 


Gabriel smirked and looked back up at the house.  "How would you like me to take down a good portion of the drug cartel?" 


"You're fucking crazy!" 


Hell fucking yes he was. 


Gabriel grinned and pulled around the corner away from the house and opened the trunk, grabbing all the weaponry that he could manage to fit on his person somewhere.  He straightened his shoulders.  Time to get this done.


Gabriel gunned the engine of the car and pulled away from the front door of the house. 


“And where do you think you are going?” Sam asked, watching the video feed following Gabriel. 


“I’m not about to grab the guns out of the trunk under a rain of gunfire.  Also, I don’t actually want to kill this dude,” Gabriel said, opening the door to the back of the car, where the mostly naked cop was hanging out.  “Sorry man, I can let you go, but I need the outfit for now.” 


Gabriel hummed as he popped the trunk and tossed a few machine guns over his shoulders.  He shoved a couple of extra clips in his pockets and smirked at the fence that was separating him from where his ticket and passport were hiding. 


“You are completely fucking crazy!”


Gabriel waved to the cop as he took off and slid into the front seat of the car.  It was definitely not comfortable, but he was about to make one hell of an entrance. 


He gunned the engine and slammed the car in reverse, pulling up in front of the house.  This time, he didn’t bother stopping on the driveway.  He pushed the car harder, pressing the gas pedal to the floor.  He waited until the front of the car had made it through the doorway before he dove out, managing to roll into a nearby hallway. 


Time to fuck some shit up! 










"He wasn't on the plane, Galahad, there is no Gabriel Novak on the manifest," Merlin said, tapping away at his tablet. 


Sam smiled.  "He'll be here.  Perhaps he was using an assumed name." 


"He is on none of the surveillance cameras.  No one has seen him since he entered that house,” Merlin said, adjusting his glasses.  “By driving a car through the front door. 


“You could say that he made quite the entrance,” Sam said, keeping his hands in his pockets.  "He will be here, Merlin." 


"Even a little early!" Gabriel called, walking up towards the men in front of him.  He kept pointed his gun into the air and stopped a few feet away.  He savored the stunned look on Merlin's face and the other engineers who were giving him incredulous looks. 




Gabriel smirked.  "Every self-respecting drug lord with a house like that has a private jet.  I got to drink champagne the whole way back."  He straightened a little when Sam smiled at him and threw a wink at the others.  "I even brought you all a present." 


He turned and waved the man behind him forward.  "Signed, sealed and delivered, since I thought you might like a little cherry on top."  Gabriel fought down the surge of pleasure when Sam's smile turned into a delighted laugh. 


"Well, Merlin?" Sam asked. 


Merlin nodded at them both.  "Gabriel is to report to his next test tomorrow evening," 


Gabriel couldn't help the huge ass grin on his face as Sam stepped closer to him.  He'd done good, even Sam thought that he had done good.  "So?" 


"Well done, Gabriel, well done," Sam said, turning to lead Gabriel to his car.  "Come, I have a present I wish to give you." 


"Presents?  Hell yeah!" 










Gabriel tried not to bounce on his feet when Sam pulled in front of Kingsman.  He was still buzzing from the last twenty four hours that seemed like a dream.  Adrenaline itched under his skin as he walked towards the front door. 


"So what're we doing now?  Come on Sam, give me a hint," Gabriel pleaded, following Sam towards the back of the shop. 


Sam stopped in front of the desk and smiled at Iseult.  "Dressing room one, please." 


"Dressing room one is currently unavailable, sir," Iseult said, glancing towards the doorway. 


Sam stiffened and looked towards the door as it opened.  Metatron walked out and he smiled blandly. 


"Why Mr. Wesson, I was not expecting to see you here!" Metatron exclaimed, smirking at him.  "Fancy that." 


“It’s a pleasure to see you again, Metatron.  I wasn’t aware you were in town.” 


"Oh yes," Metatron said, lifting his hat off his head.  "After I saw your beautiful smoking jacket, I simply had to have one for myself, and as I had several meetings here that I must attend, I had to stop by to pick one up for myself.  Any recommendations on an excellent haberdashery?" 


"Of course.  Lock and Co, just three blocks down on Bond street, they are the best in London, and I am certain that you want the best,” Sam said, smiling.


Gabriel stared at Sam and then back to Metatron going on.  He stepped forward and held out his hand, grinning wide.  “Gabriel.  Nice to meet you Metatron.” 


Metatron chuckled and shook his hand, his grip a little bit too hard.  “A pleasure, Gabriel.  How do you know Mister Wesson?” 


“Oh, well, he’s-“


“Gabriel is my new valet, and I was just introducing him to my tailor,” Sam said, giving another smile.  “I wouldn’t want to make you late, Metatron, and you do still need time to pick up your top hat.”


Gabriel resisted the urge to scowl at Sam.  Well now there was a whole hell of a lot of tension now in the room.  What the fuck was going on?


"Thank you, I appreciate the car for my time!" Metratron said with a laugh.  He tipped his hat to them before heading out. 


Sam took a slow breath and watched him leave the building, looking towards Iseult, giving him a nod.  "Quickly," he ordered. 


Gabriel was about to ask what the hell that meant when Sam was holding open the door to the dressing room in front of him.  He stepped in and looked to the floor, making sure that he was standing in the center of the carpet for wherever they were going today.  "So what is so special about dressing room one?" 


Sam smiled.  “I’ll show you dressing room one after Iseult is done cleaning up.  This is dressing room three.” 


Gabriel looked around the small room and into the mirror.  He crossed his arms over his chest and smirked, raising an eyebrow.  “We going up or down this time?” 


“Neither,” Sam said.  He gestured to the hooks on the wall.  "Pull that first hook," he instructed. 


Gabriel reached out and tugged on it, and laughed delightedly when the walls in front of him parted, revealing a weapons cache.  "Holy shit, are you serious Sam?"  Sam chuckled behind him and Gabriel walked into the room, looking around at everything. 


"I have done a disservice to you Gabriel.  You have managed quite well on you own, but I will help you get the rest of the way.  Then you will have no disadvantage," Sam said, walking towards the wall, gesturing for Gabriel to follow him. 


"Huh?" Gabriel asked, spinning around after he tore his eyes away from the machine guns on the back wall. 


Sam smiled.  "Your lack of being born with a silver spoon often plays to your advantage in these tests, but, I shall help you in one last area.  All Kingsman suits are bullet proof, the fabric interwoven with a form of kevlar.  Today we will fit you for one, a bespoke suit, as all suits should be."  He gestured to a wall of fabrics. 


Gabriel's mouth dropped open and he laughed, pushing his fingers through his hair.  "Seriously Sam?  So the posh suits aren’t all for show after all!"  Sam’s lips quirked up in a grin, his dimples showing and Gabriel felt his fucking heart flutter.


Sam held up another pair of shoes.  "These here, are Oxfords.  They have open lacing, and while there is a great deal of intricacy in shoes that a gentleman wears, there are simple words to live by.  These here, have what is called broguing." 


The light dawned and Gabriel grinned.  "Oxfords, not brogue."  Sam shot him a smile and handed him a pair. 


"Those are words to live by, Gabriel.  Try these on," he instructed, walking a little further into the room.  "The umbrella, you are already familiar with.  This is our standard issue pistol, which also fires a shotgun shell-"


"Badass!" Gabriel said, grinning at the guns on the wall.  He finished slipping the other shoe on and stood up for inspection from Sam.  Damn, these were nice shoes.  Sam gave him an approving smile and he was going to ignore just how much he liked that smile directed at him like that.  Fucking hot bastard. 


Now," Sam instructed.  "Do your best impression of a German aristocrat's formal salute." 


Gabriel stood up and gave Sam a helpless shrug.  Sam rolled his eyes at him and bent his legs, his heels sliding apart and then together again.  Gabriel grinned wide when a small blade appeared at the tip of his shoes.  "Fuck yes!" 


"Tipped in a very, very deadly neurotoxin.  A simple brush with the blade will be enough to incapacitate and kill," Sam explained. 


Gabriel slapped his heels together and admired the blade.  Little fucker looked sharp as hell too.  "How do I put it back in?" 


"Very carefully," Sam cautioned, pressing the tip of the blade into the wood and letting the blade go back into the sheath. 


Gabriel repeated the motion and looked around the rest of the room.  He walked towards the lighters and lifted one up.  "What does this do?  Electrocute you?" 


"Don't be ridiculous," Sam said, plucking it from his fingers.  "It's a hand grenade." 


"Shut up," Gabriel said, his eyes stuck on the small device on Sam's hand. 


“If you’ll want to electrocute someone, you’ll need a signet ring.  Normally, a gentleman wears them on his left hand, however, a Kingsman wears them on his dominant hand,” Sam explained, holding up his ring hand.  “Flick a small switch and it will deliver fifty thousand volts to the opponent of your choice.” 


Sam lit up at the sight of a pen and Gabriel couldn’t help the curl of want that settled down into his damn toes.  He looked so excited.  Gabriel bit down on his lip. 


“Now this?  This is my favorite, out of all of them.  One of our greatest examples of chemical engineering.”  He held up the pen and pulled it apart.  “In here, a deadly toxin.  Harmless if ingested.  Unless…” He flicked the side of the pen.  “Armed, primed…”  He slid the clip back into place and smirked at Gabriel.  “Lethal.  Dead in less than twenty seconds.” 


Gabriel swallowed hard.  Fuck he wanted to pin Sam to the wall and be fucked blind.  “Damn,” he whispered. 


“Sirs, fitting room one is ready,” Iseult announced.


Sam smiled at Gabriel and gestured to the door.  “After you Gabriel.” 


“Why thank you,” Gabriel said, effecting his most posh accent.  Sam threw his head back and laughed, and fuck that was worth it.  He followed Iseult to the fitting room and slipped in behind him, looking around at the much larger room. 


Sam settled into a chair on the opposite end of the room and smiled at Gabriel.  "Now, remove the shoes and everything except for your boxers and stand on the little platform in the center of the room." 


Gabriel turned around before Sam could see how much that statement made him blush.  Bastard.  He needed to learn that Sam didn't mean things like that and he was only saying it because he had to, not because he actually wanted Gabriel to strip for him.  "If you'd wanted me naked, you just had to ask," Gabriel purred, stretching as he stripped off his clothes. 


"I'll keep that in mind," Sam said, walking around in front of Gabriel.  "However, in this case, it's for your fitting.  A bespoke suit is meticulously fitted, and yours will be no different." 


Gabriel met Sam's eyes and smiled, unable to help the thrill of excitement that went through him.  If he was being fitted for one of these suits...then Sam must have confidence that he was going to make it all the way through this damn interview. 


When Sam looked at him again, Gabriel nearly forgot that Iseult was in the room, because he knew that look.  He'd seen it directed his way since he was fifteen and to see it from Sam…


A shiver went up his spine and he licked his lips, waiting for Sam to break the eye contact with him. 


When he passed this test, he was going to make damn sure that Sam knew he wanted that look directed his way a hell of a lot more often.  'Yes,' he mouthed, watching Sam's pupil's grow larger before the taller man looked down, inspecting the handle of his umbrella. The thrill of being wanted, of being desired by Sam was liquid fire in his blood and if Iseult hadn't coughed, he would have been on his knees in front of Sam in seconds. 


As tempted as he was to say anything, spending the next hour being poked and prodded by Iseult wasn’t exactly arousing and Sam seemed determined not to meet his eyes and share that charged llok again. 


Had he misunderstood the look?  Gabriel debated it as they headed back to Sam’s car and drove to the Kingsman compound. 


He had never been more glad to see his bed in the compound, with Loki waiting at the foot of it like he’d never left.  He flopped onto it immediately and gave a low groan.  Fuck, it was perfect, holy shit.


“Gabriel?  What the fuck are you doing here?” 


Gabriel cracked open an eye and flicked Baldur off.  “I’ll tell you after I sleep, I’m fucking knackered.” 


“You left,” Kali said, going to sit on her bed next to Gabriel’s.  “How are you back?” 


“I fucking earned it with extra credit that involved taking down a drug cartel, kidnapping a drug lord and turning him in, after starting off in nothing more than my underwear.  Can I sleep now?” Gabriel asked, opening both of his eyes to stare at them.


Kali settled back onto her bed and peeled her shoes.  At least that answer had been enough for her for the time being. 


“That is bullshit!” Baldur snarled.  “You fucked off, and now you just get to come back here and rejoin like you didn’t leave?” 


Gabriel snorted.  “You have a problem?  Go bitch to Merlin.” 


That shut both of them up, at least for now.  He had no doubt that Baldur would actually go to Merlin, even if Kali wouldn’t.  She was probably glad he was back, if only because he’d be easier than Baldur to beat in some of the tests. 


Fuck it was good to be back.










Merlin walked into the dorm and cleared his throat.  “Ready?” 


Gabriel grinned at Kali and settled back in his seat.  He felt better than he had in fucking weeks.  We was going to ace this shit! 


"Your test is to seduce the mark.  Your method will be of your own choosing, but whoever he goes home with will be the first to pass this test.  He'll be leaving the bar in thirty minutes, so I would advise you to act quickly." 


Gabriel adjusted the white collar of his shirt and the jacket he was wearing.  Not that he didn't like seducing dudes, and not that he couldn't, whenever he wanted to now, but there was a certain tall, smiling bastard he would have much rather been seducing.  He pushed his hair out of his face and walked past Kali as she headed for the bar. 


She had her own plan, he was damn sure, but he hadn't missed her smile of pleasure when she had seen him waiting for them wearing a white button up shirt and a simple jacket over it with black jeans.  It was almost identical to the outfit that Baldur was wearing, but his ass was a hell of a lot better.  Which could come in handy, considering they were supposed to seduce this dude.


Gabriel settled on the couch next to their mark, whose name was Dean, not touching him, and gave him a lazy grin.  "This seat taken?" 


"Since you are sitting there, I might say yes," the blonde said, eyeing him. 


Gabriel chuckled and raised an eyebrow.  "That's a literal response.  You mind if I join you?" 


"I would have told you if I did." 


"Unwind a little bit there, man," Gabriel said.  "You want a drink?" 


"How gauche.  Offering him a drink within five minutes of meeting him, really?  Could there be a more terrible method?"  Kali leaned low and offered her hand to the blonde man.  "Perhaps you should buy me a drink." 


Gabriel scowled and cursed Kali for a second.  Fucking bitch was brilliant.  If the dude had any inclination to the ladies, Kali probably had him, hook, line and sinker with that move, her leg and cleavage on display.  "I believe that I was here first, darlin'," he drawled, eyeing Kali. 


"Then we shall allow him to decide," she shot back, sitting on the arm of the couch.


Gabriel watched as Kali shifted, slowly exposing most of her leg in her dress.  Fucking gorgeous bitch, and she was playing their mark like a fiddle.  He hadn't looked away from her since she had showed up. 


Their mark laughed and grinned at both of them.  "How about I buy you both drinks and we can decide from there?" 


Gabriel met Kali’s eyes and agreed with a laugh.  “Why not!  I’m certainly not opposed to having the company of two hot people.” 


Kali and their mark laughed again and there was a round of champagne ordered for them.  By the time the champagne had arrived, Baldur had joined them and Gabriel wanted to groan at the picture they must have made.  They were the most unsubtle spies ever, and he had no doubt that Merlin and Sam were laughing at them from wherever they were observing.  They deserved it. 


“Good thing I ordered another round!” Their mark said with a grin, causing all of them to shake with stilted laughter.  Gabriel picked up the glass of champagne and took a sip, his nose wrinkling at the taste.  Salty.  He’d take a good beer over shit-tasting crap like this any day. 


Gabriel turned to tell their mark as much and opened his mouth to speak, but the words weren’t there.  He blinked, slowly and looked down at the champagne.  Something had been in the champagne!  He had to warn Kali and the others.  He shifted, his body feeling weighed-down and turned to tell her, only to see her slump over and onto the mark. 




The last thing he saw was the bright green eyes of the mark smirking at him.  Fuck, Sam was going to kill him. 
















Gabriel woke up swearing.  His tongue felt swollen and his head ached.  He took a second to assess the situation (both his arms and legs were tied down, he was somewhere inside or underground by the lack of fresh air and he was completely, royally fucked) before he opened his eyes. 


He looked to the side and blinked a few times to make sure that he wasn’t imagining the train tracks that he could see.  He tugged on the ropes again, sliding his wrists around, looking for the knot.  Bastards might have under-estimated him and gotten sloppy. 


“You won’t get out that way.” 


Gabriel looked up at the figure standing in front of him and scowled.  “Fuck off,” he growled, going back to feeling the ropes. 


“Tell me what you know about Kingsman,” the figure ordered. 


“No fucking idea what you’re on about,” Gabriel said, flexing his arms and testing the give of the ropes.  Pretty much nothing.  Fuck


“Hmmm,” he hummed.  “Are they worth dying for, Gabriel?  Never seeing your sister again?” 


Gabriel stiffened and looked back towards the man on the edge of the platform.  “What the fuck are you on, mate?” 


“A little incentive is required, I see,” the man said, looking down the tunnel. 


Gabriel’s heart dropped into his stomach at the sound of a train horn.  The Underground.  He was tied to the tracks of the Underground, and there was a train coming. 


The man stepped closer and held out a knife.  “Tell me what you know about Kingsman and I’ll toss you this.” 


“I don’t know what the bloody hell you are talking about, let me go!” Gabriel spat, struggling harder.  The tracks under him were starting to shake, the train was getting closer.  Out of time, out of time, fuck, he was out of time! 


The man twirled the knife between his fingers.  “Are they really worth all of this?” 


Gabriel didn’t bother answering, turning his head to look at the knot.  Fuck, he needed a way to get that knife! 


“You’re out of time, Gabriel, if you want to live, if you want to see Anna again-”


“Fuck off and give me the knife, I have no idea what you are talking about!” Gabriel snarled, the shape of the train appearing out of the darkness as it barreled towards him. 


The man knelt down at his feet and smirked and Gabriel flexed, wishing that he could break the bastard’s jaw.  Getting the knife now wouldn’t matter, he wouldn’t be able to cut himself free fast enough.


“Are they worth dying for, Gabriel?  Are they really worth your life?” 


Gabriel turned his eyes to the man standing in front of him.  Goodbye Anna.  “You fucking bet your ass they are!” He shouted over the train horn.  Twenty feet, the train horn blared again and Gabriel closed his eyes.  At least it wouldn’t fucking-


The tracks he was on dropped suddenly and Gabriel stared in shock as the train rushed over him.  After it was gone, the ropes around his wrists went slack and he was able to shrug them off easily.  The platform rose back up to the track level and Sam was where the man had been standing. 


“Bloody well done, Gabriel.”


Sam was there, smiling at him like he couldn’t be prouder.  Fucking hell.  “The mark was a Kingsman, wasn’t he?” 


Sam’s smile got wider and Gabriel stood up, jumping onto the side platform, following Sam into another doorway.  “Kali?” 


“Passed with flying colors, just like you,” Sam said. 


Gabriel couldn’t contain his excited grin.  “Baldur?” 




Gabriel bit down on his lip.  It wasn’t gentlemanly to shout with glee.  Though from the smile he could see on Sam’s face, he wasn’t doing a great job of containing himself.  “Who was the Knight we were all supposed to seduce?” 


“My brother, Dagonet,” Sam said, opening a door for Gabriel.  “Through here please.” 


“Runs in the family for you guys, eh?” Gabriel asked, grinning widely at Sam. 


“You could say that.” 


Gabriel stepped into the room with Kali and nodded back at her when she smiled at him.  He left Sam’s side and went to stand beside her a moment later.  “Well that was terrifying.” 


“Agreed,” Kali said, raising an eyebrow at him.  “Wise of them to test us with another Kingsman.” 


“Glad you made it too,” Gabriel shot back, bumping her shoulder.  She gave him a withering look, but he only grinned at her. 




Gabriel rolled his eyes and turned to face Kali.  He stuck his hand out to her and smirked.  “May the best win.  To the victor the spoils and no hard feelings.”  It was easy to see the gratefulness in Kali’s eyes and Gabriel shook her hand before turning back to Sam. 


Sam gave him a pleased smile and Gabriel straightened a little further when Merlin entered the room, looking at them both over the rim of his glasses. 


“Gabriel, Kali.  It’s time for the final exam.  Follow me,” Merlin said, turning his back and leading them out of the room. 


Gabriel caught Sam’s eyes for a second as he left and bit down on his lip.  Fuck.  Maybe after he got the damn job he would pin Sam to a wall and kiss him senseless.  Or maybe the reverse. 


Merlin dropped him off in a parlor room of sorts and Gabriel knelt down to pet Loki, rubbing behind his ears.  “Good boy.  We’re almost done.  Almost done and you’ve done damn good if I do say so myself.” 


Loki’s tail only wagged harder and Gabriel knelt down, grinning at him.  “Ready for whatever they throw at us?”  Loki barked at him and Gabriel laughed, straightening when Arthur entered the room.  He drew himself up to attention.  “Loki, sit.” 


“Well, well, looks you have trained him well,” Arthur said, sitting in one of the wingback chairs, eyeing Gabriel.  “I confess that I am surprised you made it this far, Gabriel.  But Galahad has chosen well.” 


Gabriel couldn’t help the grin that flashed over his face quickly before he cleared his throat.  “Thank you, sir.” 


“You are welcome,” Arthur said.  “What’s his name?” 


Gabriel smiled.  “Loki.” 


“Norse mythology or modern movie Loki?” 


“Norse mythology Loki.  I loved the gods who were tricksters in their own right.  Not always good, and not always evil.  Their own brand of justice somewhere between.  A lot like Kingsman, really,” Gabriel said, holding his head up under Arthur’s heavy stare. 


“Interesting,” he said, tapping on his jaw. 


Gabriel waited for any other questions to come, but none seemed to be forthcoming.  He cleared his throat.  “Sir?” 


“Yes, yes.  Now, to your final test.  It’s quite simple.”  Arthur pulled a revolver out of his jacket and offered it to Gabriel. 


Gabriel closed his hand around the handle of the gun and looked at Arthur.  His heart was starting to pound.  He pointed the gun at the ground and waited for his order.


“Shoot the dog,” Arthur said, waving to Loki. 


“Wh-what?”  Gabriel whispered, tightening his hand on the gun so it didn’t shake. 


“You heard me.  Shoot the dog.” 


Gabriel swallowed and pointed the gun at Loki.  He placed his finger on the trigger.  It was just a dog.  Just an animal.  He needed to do this, he had to do this, there was nothing that he could go back to, and if he was willing to die for them, for Kingsman, then he had to be willing to do this.  He would kill people, all across the world, he just had to do this one, last thing. 


Loki stared back at him, his mouth open slightly as he panted.  Gabriel took a deep breath and closed his eyes.  He just needed to pull the trigger.  He opened his eyes again and met Loki’s eyes.  Fuck.  Fucking dammit!  He dropped the nose of the gun to the carpet and sighed.  “No.” 


Another shot rang out in the house and Gabriel looked in the direction it had come from.  He pictured Kali’s poodle, laying on the floor in a puddle of blood and sighed.  There went his shot.  Gone.  Because he couldn’t shoot a damn dog. 


“Well.  At least the girl has balls.  Get out Gabriel, I knew you would never belong here,” Arthur said. 


Gabriel put the gun down on the side table and headed back to the dorm.  It would be better to get out of here before Sam could find him and give him the disappointed puppy dog eyes of doom.  He grabbed his duffel bag and stuffed the rest of his belongings into it before slinging it over his shoulder.  “C’mon Loki, let’s go.” 


He turned to the door and froze at the sight of Sam in the doorway.  Dammit.  Of course he couldn’t get out of here without seeing Sam again.  Gabriel met disappointed hazel eyes for a moment and then dropped them to the floor. 


“I’ll drive you home,” Sam said, turning and walking away. 


Gabriel followed Sam, because he had no idea how he was going to get home otherwise and he really didn’t feel like hitchhiking in downtown London.  It’d been months since he’d seen his father, even longer since he’d been home.  “Don’t know that I even have one ‘nymore.” 


Sam didn’t say anything in response, of course, not that he expected him to.  Gabriel climbed into Sam’s precious car and buckled himself in, glancing at Sam for a brief second when he turned the car on.  Nothing.  Nothing at all. 


The ride back towards central London was so silent it was fucking oppressive.  The only sound was Loki’s heavy breathing in the backseat.  By the time they pulled in front of Sam’s townhouse, Gabriel was ready to crawl out of his own damn skin.  Sam just needed to get the fucking ‘I’m disappointed in you’ conversation over with so he could go back to fucking up his own life. 


“Come on,” Sam said, opening the door to the house. 


Gabriel cursed under his breath, but opened his door and then Loki’s, motioning him up and into the house.  Loki bounded up the stairs like he belonged there and Gabriel cursed when he found the bastard flopped in front of the fireplace in the living room.  He followed his dog and sat down on the edge of one of the couches. 


Sam shut the door behind him and Gabriel fought the urge to groan even more loudly.  He needed Sam to just hurry up and curse his life choices and let him go back to the gutter that he crawled out of.  “Can you hurry up already?” 


Sam sat down on the couch and hummed.  “With what?” 


“I’m disappointed in you, it’s just a dog, why couldn’t you just pull the trigger, you would have had to do this a hundred times over, I thought you were better than this...pick your fucking phrase, I don’t care,” Gabriel growled.  “I couldn’t shoot the damn dog, and I failed you.” 


“I would say that you failed yourself, not me,” Sam said, standing to go and pour himself a drink. 


Gabriel groaned and rubbed his face in his hands.  “Did you shoot your damn dog?”  Maybe they hadn’t had that test back then, maybe Sam had had to do something else other than-


“Yes,” Sam said.  “Look at the fireplace.” 


Gabriel did and froze at the sight of a german shepherd sitting next to the fireplace.  Stuffed.  Sam had shot his dog and then had him stuffed.  A mix of horror, disgust and curiosity had him standing and walking over to it.  “You shot your dog and then had him stuffed?” 


Sam sighed and turned to Gabriel.  “I did.  I shot my dog.  And then for the next ten years, my best friend was the only one waiting for me when I came home from this job.” 


Gabriel blinked in surprise at Sam.  “What?” 


“It was a blank Gabriel.  There was no bullet.” 


Gabriel looked back at the dog sitting next to the fireplace and felt his stomach roll uncomfortably.  They wouldn’t have made him shoot Loki.  He’d failed for no reason, because he couldn’t…


“Even the girl, Victoria, didn’t die.  She works in our Vancouver branch.” 


Gabriel’s mouth felt dry.  Kali’s words from their first night echoed in his mind again.  It’s just tricks.  Scare tactics.  “I…”  He swallowed and walked back to the couch again.  He sat down and let his head hang.  “Fuck.” 


“I’d say that’s about the size of it.” 


Gabriel settled down on the couch and dropped his head into his hands, rubbing at his hair.  Fuck.  He’d fucked up so bad, and now there was nothing that Sam could do for him.  “What do we do?” 


“You stay here, for right now.  I have to fly out shortly on assignment,” Sam said.  He picked up a tablet and offered it to Gabriel.  “You’re going to watch the feed from my glasses.  Maybe you’ll learn something.  I’ll be back in two days, I need to find out what Metatron is planning to do in Kentucky.” 


Gabriel tightened his hands on the tablet and nodded staring down at it.  His mouth was too dry to respond.  He wanted to tell Sam to be safe, but this was Sam.  He was always smart, and he kicked truly epic amounts of ass. 


A large hand landed on his shoulder and gave a slow squeeze.  Gabriel sucked in a breath and clenched his eyes shut when the tablet in front of him started to look watery. 


“I’ll be back soon.” 


Gabriel heard the door shut behind Sam and swallowed hard around the lump in his throat.  He clenched his eyes tight before forcing them open to look down at the tablet.  He activated the feed from Sam’s glasses and then opened a few of Sam’s files on Metatron, starting to read. 


He had a few hours before Sam landed in Kentucky.  Gabriel should have spent it drinking, but instead he read every single note that Sam had on the man until his eyes were swimming. 


Gabriel dozed off, Sam’s tablet in his lap. 


The sound of shouting woke him up and he glared at the tablet before remembering what he was watching.  Gabriel sat up immediately and flicked the video to full screen.  He scowled at the sermon Sam was watching and studied the feed, zooming in to check and see if any of them had implant scars.  Nothing.  The sound of a gunshot had him jumping back to fullscreen. 


Gabriel watched Sam shoot another man, his eyes going wide.  “Sam!” he shouted.  He didn’t care if Merlin or Arthur heard him.  “Sam, what the fuck is going on?”  Sam spun around, firing shots, killing people with beautifully lethal ease. 


He flinched as he saw another woman be impaled in the background, fistfights and death reigning all around Sam as he spun, killing more people with every second.


Gabriel couldn’t help but wince as another spray of blood hit Sam’s glasses.  “Fucking hell, Sam, Sam, come on!” 


It couldn’t have lasted more than three or four minutes, but when it was over, and the pastor of the church was resting in front of Sam, a wooden spear sticking out of his head, Gabriel had to swallow hard to keep his stomach in tact.


Sam stumbled out of the church, holding his hand up against the light of the sun.  His head still felt clouded, but now it was starting to clear.  He forced down the horror trying to rise up as he realized what he had just done.  Metatron was standing in front of him and Sam squinted, bringing his image slowly into focus. 


“What did you do to me?” Sam asked, looking back at the church.  “I killed, all those people.  I had no control over what I was doing.”


Metatron laughed, patting the gun in his hand.  “It’s the microchips I’ve been distributing.  This was just the test run to see if they worked.  And they did.  They lift all of your brain’s inhibitors.  You become mindless, only sheer emotion. the Hulk.  Except without the muscles and invulnerability.” 






Gabriel lurched as Metatron raised a gun to Sam’s head.  “Sam!!”  He flipped frantically through the applications on the tablet.  There had to be something, they were Kingsmen, they had to have thought of this.  They had to. 






“You’re planning to do this to the entire world, aren’t you?” Sam asked, holding up his hands. 


“The herd needs thinning.  If I don’t do it, then we all die.  At least this way, there are no regrets.  Nineteen minutes and the population will be back down to manageable levels for all of us.  The human race will go on,” Metatron said, waving the gun. 


Sam snorted, raising an eyebrow.  “So you plan to commit mass-genocide at the drop of a hat?” 






Gabriel cursed and brought the video back up, his heart pounding.  Metatron had two men and a woman standing behind him.  He’d seen Sam fight back against worse odds, hell, this was probably a walk in the park for him.  Something he did on weekends, on his day off.  He gripped the tablet tighter, staring at it.  “C’mon Sam, please.” 






“I’m saving the human race!  They should erect statues in my honor!” Metatron said, smirking at Sam.  “And Kingsman isn’t going to stop me.” 


Sam smiled blandly.  “So I guess this is where you take me hostage, put me into an impossible to get out of cell that I break free from to save the day.” 


Metatron cocked the gun.  “I guess it is.” 


“Sounds good to me then,” Sam said.


“Too bad this isn’t that kind of movie.” 










Gabriel screamed Sam’s name as the gun went off.  Sam’s glasses went flying and so did his video feed.  They landed a few feet away, facing Sam.  Sam, who had a growing pool of blood under his head, who wasn’t moving


“No!!  Sam, get up, no, you can’t be dead, get up you fucking bastard!” 


Loki came into the room, his nails clacking along the hardwood floor.  Gabriel ignored his worried whine, staring at the video feed and the blood that was steadily creeping closer to the glasses. 


“Sam, come on, get up, I know you’re not dead, you can’t fucking be dead, get up and kick their asses, please, Sam, please!” 


The video feed cut out moments later and Gabriel dropped the tablet, heard it hit the ground with a satisfying crunch.  Fuck.  Fucking Sam.  He was dead.  Dead and never coming back.  Sam, who’d loved his dog so much he’d had him stuffed.  Sam, whose smiles were like the sun coming out from behind a cloud, Sam, who he’d wanted and who he was pretty fucking sure wanted him too was gone.  Fucking gone


Gabriel picked up the tablet from the floor and threw it at the fireplace, watching as the plastic began to melt and twist as it crumpled in on itself.  He slumped down to the floor and held onto Loki as the dog climbed into his lap.  Sam was gone.  Fucking gone.  He’d never even fucking said thank you. 


He was an ungrateful bastard, and now he’d never get a chance to prove otherwise.  He’d fucked up Kingsman, he’d fucked things up with Sam and now the world was going to go to hell tomorrow with people slaughtering each other. 


Gabriel stayed curled up on the floor until the fire had burned itself out.  The room was dark now.  He needed a drink.  He needed to get so drunk that he would see Sam’s fucking blood on the pavement every time he blinked.  He stumbled to Sam’s study.  Sam had always kept the good stuff in the cabinet in here. 


Gabriel grabbed the bottle of brandy off the desk in his office and choked down two hard gulps, letting the alcohol burn all of the way down his stomach.  Sam would yell at him for trying to chug brandy this old.  He took another gulp, the tears in his eyes burning more than the fucking booze. 


He raised the bottle again when one of the news articles caught his eye.  3-1, Chelsea wins!


I defused a bomb at the Vatican here. 


Gabriel let his eyes drift to another picture. 


We don’t do this job for the recognition.


He put the bottle down on the desk and clenched the edge with his fingertips.  “We do it because it has to be done, because we can.” 


Metatron had to be stopped.  Six billion people were going to die.  Gabriel looked at another of the front covers.  Queen Elizabeth - Dead or Alive?  He grinned and stood up straighter, wiping off his face.  He’d have to see what the covers said the day after he saved the world. 


“C’mon Loki.  We’ve got a job to do,” Gabriel said, striding out of the office.  He would put a bullet through Metatron’s head if it was the last thing that he did.  For Sam. 




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